I am what I am

1 Corinthians 15:10: But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them--yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.

So here I am, the night before leaving Elim Bible Institute on a 5-6 week internship in NYC at NYSUM, the New York School of Urban Ministry.

I am thinking of all that has brought me to this point and I am grateful for the many people who have been the supply of God to me and my dear support. I love you all a lot! :D

I'm also thinking about what God has been showing me this entire summer about strength...namely, how I have none and He has it all. I am learning, slowly yet surely, that I cannot do anything. God doesn't want me to. He wants me to rely on His strength each and every day, knowing that apart from him, I can do nothing. John 15:5. It's been wonderful to, time after time, watch him come through when I have nothing to give. I am living in more freedom and grace than I have before, and it is incredible. I pray that I will carry this life lesson with me each day I'm serving in NYC...I'll need it.

My fibromyalgia has been such a struggle lately and I am persevering in my commitment to keep up a healthy diet, which will keep the worst of it under control. It's a slow process with many mess-ups and U-turns, but God is faithful to stick it out with me and help me step by step.

I was made a co-leader of one of the three teams that our class is split up into. We call ourselves Team 130 because we are givin 130% in what we do. ;D I'm just a wee bit nervous about leading, but to be honest, I know it's where I'm supposed to be. I can't deny the fact that I absolutely love to lead and be my team's biggest servant and cheerleader. It's how I'm created. I am what I am by the grace of God and I do hope that I will have worked harder than the rest when all is said and done. I want to give 130% to Jesus...by HIS strength, of course! [;

God showed me something at the beginning of the summer: "Carleigh, you're amazing. Get over it." It sounds a bit strange, but it is exactly what I needed to hear. God has been slowly revealing to me how He looks at me, what He sees in me, and how much of a masterpiece I really am. At the same time, He is reminding me that everything I have comes from Him, and there is no room to boast. For what do I have that I have not received? 1 Corinthians 4:7
A lot of times I let myself get backed up into a corner by the fear of pride, but there's really no reason for that. I shouldn't fear pride, I should get over it and not let it have any power to do anything!! By God's grace, that's the path I'm on.

I have to tell you a couple other cool things about this semester:

1. I have a TOTALLY awesome roommate!!! Her name is Britt and she can handle my strangeness and personality very well, which is great. I can also handle hers, hehe, and we like to bounce jokes and silly sayings off each other all the time. I couldn't have asked for someone better. Our colors even coordinate! We both brought mainly green, blue, and orange stuff :D

2. I'm on fourth floor now and I need your prayers to help me up those steps multiple times a day :/ I'm gonna have some serious leg muscles at the end of this semester! :O

3. The teachers continue to be their amazing selves and I am looking forward to my classes this semester:
Urban Ministry (already took it and it was fanTASTic)
Romans (taking it now and absolutely love it)
--- these I will take after NYSUM:
Worship Leadership (really looking forward to this!)
Basic Christian Counseling (a favorite class among students)
Sin, Christ & Salvation (the good news)

4. I'm making new friends, keeping the old, and getting closer to old acquaintances. It's wonderful! I love the atmosphere here--where it's perfectly normal to see a group praying outside on the street or worshiping on the balcony.

5. Chapel every day is such a blessing and I'm getting involved with EGC, Elim Gospel Church, again...which is where I really feel called to go for church. (Which, I've realized, is rather nice, since the church is 5 minutes away across the pond!) I'm also praying about/hoping to get involved in the youth group there.

Well, I might have forgotten somethin...but there you go! God is good and I can't wait for what's ahead. No fear, lot's of trust, and lot's of thankfulness for life. Life is worth living, life is Christ is everlasting, and while we wait for Him to come back, we reign.

For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God's abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ. Romans 5:17

Let go and let God.